the end of an era...hopefully

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

It is no secret that my little Amelia is not a great sleeper. She almost 4 years old...does not sleep through the night consistently. It's exhausting to say the least. I was terribly spoiled with my boys who have always been great sleeper. Ever since they were little we would put them to bed and unless they were sick or had a bad dream they just stayed there. Never came out of their room multiple times, nothing. 

And then there was Sissy.

When we moved into this house she had just started sleeping really really well. She was still in a crib and when we moved we decided it was the perfect time to move her into a big girl bed. I'm not sure if it was the bed or the new house but she was terrified of her room. So every night I would read her a story and lay with her until she fell asleep.

Fast forward a year and a half.

I am still laying with her every night until she falls asleep. Most nights it's pretty fast but then there are those nights that I am literally in there for hours. Those are the nights that take me to my breaking point. I just want my evenings back. Those long evenings I would lay in her bed awake rationalizing with myself "she is only going to be this little for a short time," "she isn't always going to need you." These thoughts would help me to calm down and feel better about this decision. But honestly the gig is up for me and while I have enjoyed our nighttime snuggles, I am ready to take control of my evenings and not feel guilty about it. She is almost 4. She needs to learn how to sleep on her own. 

I need to teach her these things.

So August 1st we are going to try a new routine and try to get our little Sissy to fall asleep by herself. I've been talking to her about it to which I get big crocodile tears in response. I figure the more we talk about it the better prepared she will be. She even picked out a new Elsa and Anna night light yesterday at Target. Honestly I really have no idea how this is going to go. It could completely backfire on me and ruin my evenings in a whole new way. The thing is we have to try. Who knows, she could completely surprise us and this transition could be quite easy. I'm not really counting on that but it would be nice right?!

My Dear Milly girl,

I have really enjoyed those sweet nights laying with you, listening to your final stories of the day, hearing your sweet voice pray and feeling your little arms around my neck or on my back. But for the love of God it is time for you to go to sleep on your own in your big girl bed. Momma needs her evenings back so that I can tackle another day with you with the right mindset. M'kay?!

Love you,

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